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Anyone Else Ever Illegaly Self Medicate Prior To Dx?


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#1 doinmdarndest

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Posted 15 December 2010 - 04:03 PM

only recently have i taken MSLT. it showed a 2 min avg latency. had 1 SOREM was "highly suggestive" of narcolepsy. my medically supervised rx regime now replaces very costly and illegal use of methamphetamine.

during those 30 or so years i was found by others using same drug an oddity because they could take it or leave it and i seemed to beleive it not possible to go w/o, and still function. i on the other hand, needed it to be at all functional.

at that time i had never seen a dr. my wife told me i likely had a medical need for stimulants and that i should see a dr. she was right. today i have no contact with illegal drugs or users of them this is good, many are career criminals i do not like the company of such people. to be fair i must recognize that others held full time jobs and were responsible mainstream citizens-they were a minority i was one.

my doseaging of illegal methamphetamine was unique compared to that of most all others i observed using same: i preferred far smaller doses several times a day. others preferred large doses about 1-3 times a day. i think this is most defining of the nature of my use, i was self medicating, seeking only to be normal. i had no use for the false sense of well being larger doses bring. i felt certian no dr. would ever help me be wakeful and hold a job w rx.

a problem exsists my tolerance to the amphetamines is extremely high. presumably the 3 decade stimulant history leaves me a man who may be fairly regarded as one whose drinking water had stimulants in it for 3 decades.


my regime: 300 mg/d adderall nuvigil 250 mg/d lisinopril 10 mg/d controls high blood pressure. my regime needs to be increased to 390 mg/d adderall and my rx'er is having an extensive evaluation done before he will consider it. the stanford sleep clinic is handling dx.

he is my first dr ever, save for pediatrics. now i know hes different from most other md's. ive read of the md's of other PWN telling them there is nothing else they can do when 60 mg/d maximum reccomended doses become innefectual. often these are very sad accounts. i know that they need(if no heart problems) a higher dose-and wont get it. one was of a young mother scarcely able to diaper her baby due to EDS, she seemed most despondent and her husband was not supportive.

my dr has probably forged ahead in a veritable arctic gale of trepidation i am grateful to him. does anyone else get high doses such as mine? other than hypertension-a thing cotrolled, and negative psychological effects of which ive none, i have yet to know what the doctors who disagree with mr dr are talking about. they havent a leg to stand on in criticizing a regime that has made me well. i need all the feedback, info, and support i can get. anyone have thoughts to offer?

-doinmdarndest

#2 sleepzone

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Posted 15 December 2010 - 10:03 PM

only recently have i taken MSLT. it showed a 2 min avg latency. had 1 SOREM was "highly suggestive" of narcolepsy. my medically supervised rx regime now replaces very costly and illegal use of methamphetamine.

during those 30 or so years i was found by others using same drug an oddity because they could take it or leave it and i seemed to beleive it not possible to go w/o, and still function. i on the other hand, needed it to be at all functional.

at that time i had never seen a dr. my wife told me i likely had a medical need for stimulants and that i should see a dr. she was right. today i have no contact with illegal drugs or users of them this is good, many are career criminals i do not like the company of such people. to be fair i must recognize that others held full time jobs and were responsible mainstream citizens-they were a minority i was one.

my doseaging of illegal methamphetamine was unique compared to that of most all others i observed using same: i preferred far smaller doses several times a day. others preferred large doses about 1-3 times a day. i think this is most defining of the nature of my use, i was self medicating, seeking only to be normal. i had no use for the false sense of well being larger doses bring. i felt certian no dr. would ever help me be wakeful and hold a job w rx.

a problem exsists my tolerance to the amphetamines is extremely high. presumably the 3 decade stimulant history leaves me a man who may be fairly regarded as one whose drinking water had stimulants in it for 3 decades.


my regime: 300 mg/d adderall nuvigil 250 mg/d lisinopril 10 mg/d controls high blood pressure. my regime needs to be increased to 390 mg/d adderall and my rx'er is having an extensive evaluation done before he will consider it. the stanford sleep clinic is handling dx.

he is my first dr ever, save for pediatrics. now i know hes different from most other md's. ive read of the md's of other PWN telling them there is nothing else they can do when 60 mg/d maximum reccomended doses become innefectual. often these are very sad accounts. i know that they need(if no heart problems) a higher dose-and wont get it. one was of a young mother scarcely able to diaper her baby due to EDS, she seemed most despondent and her husband was not supportive.

my dr has probably forged ahead in a veritable arctic gale of trepidation i am grateful to him. does anyone else get high doses such as mine? other than hypertension-a thing cotrolled, and negative psychological effects of which ive none, i have yet to know what the doctors who disagree with mr dr are talking about. they havent a leg to stand on in criticizing a regime that has made me well. i need all the feedback, info, and support i can get. anyone have thoughts to offer?

-doinmdarndest


Sometimes when you post, seems like no one is out there....Just want you to know I did read your post; but I'm sorry I can't help you. I am on the other end of the spec. I'm very sensitive and take very low dose. Good luck to you.

#3 Jonny too tired

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Posted 18 December 2010 - 08:30 PM

I have issues with getting used to meds, there are alot of people on here that it seems do. That amount that you are on is incredibly high. I am stuck at max dosage of adderall XR, according to my doctor. I accidentally double dosed one day, and realized it about an hour later when I looked at my pill box, ..... the empty slot was the only reason that I realized that I double dosed. I did not get any benefit or any ill effects from it, my doc told me it seems that I will only use so much the rest goes to waste. sounds a bit odd... I have not felt like a normal person for close to 20 years,...just some short unpredictable bursts...... unfortunately I did have quite a while in my early teens when I was above average, and I would wake in the morning and actually be refreshed and rested, with the memory of an elephant, so I know what I am missing. I am jelous of any one who finds a solution, keep your doctor who gives you your life back.

#4 sometimes

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Posted 31 December 2010 - 07:36 PM

Whoa! That sure is a lot of Adderall! The highest daily dosage I've heard of is 120 mg, though I've never actually taken a poll. The most Adderall I've had personally is 40 mg per day. The most Desoxyn I've had is 60 mg per day.

#5 ladyjae

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Posted 04 January 2011 - 03:35 PM

I self medicated for years and did not know it. i remember telling others it was the only time I felt "normal" and could function was when using speed. That did little to help them understand and more to make them think I was an addict. i stopped cold turkey for a personal reason. And slept for most of the time over 15 years, until dx. Now I am still trying to figure it out, but I do know i did function on what I used better than with out. My sleep specialist asked me how much self medicating I had done. Thats when I truly realized I had been, everyone convinced me otherwise. He said that to me, and I was pretty mix of emotions on that one!

only recently have i taken MSLT. it showed a 2 min avg latency. had 1 SOREM was "highly suggestive" of narcolepsy. my medically supervised rx regime now replaces very costly and illegal use of methamphetamine.

during those 30 or so years i was found by others using same drug an oddity because they could take it or leave it and i seemed to beleive it not possible to go w/o, and still function. i on the other hand, needed it to be at all functional.

at that time i had never seen a dr. my wife told me i likely had a medical need for stimulants and that i should see a dr. she was right. today i have no contact with illegal drugs or users of them this is good, many are career criminals i do not like the company of such people. to be fair i must recognize that others held full time jobs and were responsible mainstream citizens-they were a minority i was one.

my doseaging of illegal methamphetamine was unique compared to that of most all others i observed using same: i preferred far smaller doses several times a day. others preferred large doses about 1-3 times a day. i think this is most defining of the nature of my use, i was self medicating, seeking only to be normal. i had no use for the false sense of well being larger doses bring. i felt certian no dr. would ever help me be wakeful and hold a job w rx.

a problem exsists my tolerance to the amphetamines is extremely high. presumably the 3 decade stimulant history leaves me a man who may be fairly regarded as one whose drinking water had stimulants in it for 3 decades.


my regime: 300 mg/d adderall nuvigil 250 mg/d lisinopril 10 mg/d controls high blood pressure. my regime needs to be increased to 390 mg/d adderall and my rx'er is having an extensive evaluation done before he will consider it. the stanford sleep clinic is handling dx.

he is my first dr ever, save for pediatrics. now i know hes different from most other md's. ive read of the md's of other PWN telling them there is nothing else they can do when 60 mg/d maximum reccomended doses become innefectual. often these are very sad accounts. i know that they need(if no heart problems) a higher dose-and wont get it. one was of a young mother scarcely able to diaper her baby due to EDS, she seemed most despondent and her husband was not supportive.

my dr has probably forged ahead in a veritable arctic gale of trepidation i am grateful to him. does anyone else get high doses such as mine? other than hypertension-a thing cotrolled, and negative psychological effects of which ive none, i have yet to know what the doctors who disagree with mr dr are talking about. they havent a leg to stand on in criticizing a regime that has made me well. i need all the feedback, info, and support i can get. anyone have thoughts to offer?

-doinmdarndest



#6 jad

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Posted 04 April 2013 - 03:23 PM

I am struggling right now. I was diagnosed 20 years ago. But haven't been to a dr in 10 have been self medicating. Now I am afraid to go to dr . As I don't know what to say or expect from them

#7 DeathRabbit

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Posted 04 April 2013 - 04:47 PM

Well, just be careful. Sometimes the amateur chemists who make that stuff don't know how to properly git rid of the impurities. I would just be honest with the doc. You'll get a talking to, but they can't turn you in, unless you tell them you specifically intend to commit a certain crime, as I understand it. But being straightforward will help them decide what to do to best treat you. Without going into to much detail, I have admitted an illegal activity to a doctor before and was not arrested or anything.



#8 doinmdarndest

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 12:13 AM

privacy rules docs have to follow mean they won't tell anybody anything about you. i've been honest w/all my md's. 2 chose to prescribe my adderall. i had to chose my words very carefully. i am not so well spoken, but i pulled through somehow. here's my advice, i hope it helps you out: make sure you are not abusing the stimulants you take now. this means sleep each night, take no more than you must to function and get through your workday. your stimulant history likely has your tolerance way too high to have your symptoms treated effectively if you are prescribed stimulants in the amounts at which doctors normally start them, or even manufacturer's reccomended maximums. this = 60mg for adderall these are the highest amts. most often prescribed. they are guidelines, not rules, sometimes prescriptions are written for amts. exceeding these. instances of this are rare. do not expect medical science to have anything in the way of known effects of long term stimulant use and/or potential for increased tolerance, particularly use beyond these maximums that md's have to refer to when prescribing. it does not. you may regard this as advice from long experience, iv'e been dealing w/an ongoing attempt at getting my medical need for stimulants covered by rx alone for years. 1 mg desoxyn generic name methamphetamine = 2 mg adderall generic name mixed amphetamine salts. if 100 mg desoxyn were called a 'tenth' and cost $10, it means $3 worth of the very, very rarely prescribed desoxyn, or 30 mg, is the equivalent of 60 mg of the far more often prescribed drug adderall. this conversion is due to the molecular weight of the former being roughly half that of the latter as is noted in a stanford article. here is a link that downloads it.

 

i had to delete the link, it somehow caused computer jibberish such as '<p>' and 'nbsf;' to be interspersed throughout my reply.  deathrabbit is closer to a geek than me; maybe he knows whats up w/this, i'll ask him.  download my other posts. some are replies to pwn i felt could use the article. the link can be clicked on in those replies.  i don't know how to include it here and just spent half an hour deleting the jibberish i think was caused by including the link so im excluding it this time around.  PHARMACOLOGICAL ASPECTS OF HUMAN AND CANINE NARCOLEPSY by dr emanuel mignot and dr seiji nishino is the article.

 

i lost my formatting, too. what can i say.?

 

 it also recognises the need for higher doses in some patients. you are probably not in any position to ask for a high dose stimulant rx until your have been given one for normal doses. lower doses might work for you, everybody is different. if not, printing off this article and showing it to your md can enable you to obtain a higher dose stimulant rx when the time comes to ask for it. high doses are covered on pg. 37-38. you will likely get a new drug called nuvigil in your first stimulant rx, it works for some of us. also, there is a drug that promotes slow wave sleep the drug is xyrem. it might have you wakeful w/o stimulants or w/smaller doses of same. your mslt must have 2 sorems or it will not be covered by insurance or government coverage such as medi care. i have no experience w/xyrem as my mslt had but 1 sorem- 2.18 min onset lat. though. i'm a sleepy guy. 'ratchet-jawing' (being talkative) resembles one's getting enough stimulants as it is to an md. be very sure to avoid this in order to succeed in being prescribed a stimulant. if anything i advise is good this is. don't forget. a safe bet is probably to 'dry up' for a couple of days before your visit, and maybe you will be fine w/the rx you get. maybe it will be effective where you get to be a 'legal beagle', w/o any reason to seek other 'stimmies' this would mean you then can be a normal citizen, to whom the police, when in your prescence, are about like anybody else and no need to be wary of them exsists. i would find this truly wonderful. if it could happen for you i'd be happy for you then. REMEMBER: you must be disciplined/mentally strong/healthy to take stimulants w/o them making you 'tweeky'. you must use moderation as well. good luck.



#9 SleepyVirginia

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Posted 06 May 2013 - 03:10 PM

I am so happy you posted this. When I was prescribed adderall for add it worked fine and then either my N got worse or my tolerance got high because I started just taking as many as I needed to go to work and stay awake there. That turned out to be about 300 mg/d. I still don't understand when doctors say I could have gone into psychosis or had a heart attack - my bp remained normal and I even still had to nap during the day on 300mg! I eventually just quit adderall all together, but then picked up meth. Meth was ok - I got "high" the first time only and then after that I was just able to stay awake during the day without a nap. I'd still sleep at night though. Glad to know I'm not the only one. I am now off all drugs and was recently diagnosed with N, my average sleep latency for the nap test was 1min 30sec. The first thing my doc said to me when she saw me was "wow, you are really sleepy". Since then I've been on provigil, 100mg/3 x day. It really does help, but I still need to nap a min of 2 hours during the day. I'm terrified that it'll stop working some day since my tolerance to amphetamines is so high. Worst case senerio I find a doc who'll prescribe me the 300mg of adderall. I don't want to be on amphetamines though. Hmm :(

#10 doinmdarndest

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Posted 06 May 2013 - 10:48 PM

you should be able to get more provigil.  you might try nuvigil.  if these work ok for you that's great.  they would not for me unless i took 1g as in 1000mg or more a day.

 

they caused severe dehydration, hallucinations and mental lapses in me. inadvertently shoplifted twice, just looked in my hand outside the store, realised i had carried out something i did not pay for.  (went back in and paid, both times.)

 

'vigils' are not well tolerated in me.  amphetamines are really well tolerated in me, and here in the forums i see that it is not so for others.  be nice if research could maybe figure out how my body does it so other pwn might somehow be granted this capability someday, wouldn't it?

 

well, guess what folks? RESEARCH IS NOT INTERESTED i have canvassed so many institutions, phamacological firms such as barr (one of the few that replied) and i get back nothing but silence, or in 3 cases something that passes the buck.  it will probably do no good but i'll keep trying.

 

the fda recently approved money to do research on wakefulness promoting meds.  it should be done w/the amphetamines, little is known about them.  once the patent righjts are gone, research no longer gets done on a med because there's no profit motive after that.  i know i'm not the only one who can benefit from high dose stimulant therapy to treat eds/fatigue.

 

but wait, there's more bad news.  dr mignot recently published an article he says adderall rx should never exceed 60 mg/d.  this directly contradicts his earlier work.  i'll remit the specific articles if anyone asks, but it seems to me no one finds my posts relevant, and i've begun wondering if i'm wasing time here.  all sleep medicine is influenced by this man-who has done much good for many despite his inexplicable(to me at least) prejudice/medical opposition to high dose stimulant rx.  director of stanford sleep, dr mignot is a gaint.

 

if this description applies to any most recognized md in any sx it is him.  no sleep specialist has never heard of dr emannuel mignot.

 

more bad news still- from all i can discover in a most exaustive effort my 300mg/d. adderall = world record.  i hope if you need this rx one day you can get it.  it will likely prove far more difficult than it should.  it sure did did for me.  hope you needn't go there.  tips how i did it are in my postings; also ask me if you want my perspective and i'll give it to you-if i'm still active here, and if i'm still on this side of the grass (where any day is a good one).  best wishes !



#11 tennessee

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Posted 07 May 2013 - 09:55 AM

I'm reading your post and completely agree with the amphetamine research. I have often wished there could be research to better understand why amphetamines work and why vigils do not work on me. It doesn't make sense to me as to why this wouldn't be done. I'm not a physician but I do feel I have my phd in narcolepsy and one in the spectrum of narcoleptic medications. But to me it seems like there would be a better understanding of N and other things of this were to be explored.
Why does the amphetamines give me feel as normal as I could possibly feel when the vigils make me feel like I'm on a launching pad fixing to take off but don't. i felt like I had a 24 hour cataplexy on vigils, my thoughts were the Only thing awake.. I was basically paralyzed. I felt and looked like the guy on that movie, Patch Adams... The one in the wheelchair with his eyes bugged out, his hand raised the whole time, and eyes fixed on something and never spoke. I think his name was Beanie?
But this is suppose to be safer than amphetamines? Not for me its not. What is crazy is that doctor wanted to UP my dosage after that and I'm thinking if It were the amphetamines that gave me that reaction, do you think they would UP that dosage? Sadly I would rather deal with the n than deal with the n with another added weird behavior.

I take 90mg adderall and 60mg desoxyn daily and I have tried everything except GHB. The amphetamines are the only medications that i can tolerate without making me feel "medicated".

With that being said I am not downing the vigils in any way. I am all for doing what works and Im so proud the vigils are available for the many that it does work for. Different medications work differently on different people, unfortunately there's no one size fits all but I don't understand what makes the amphetamines fit me like a glove but the other meds made me feel like I needed to check myself in somewhere.

#12 tennessee

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Posted 07 May 2013 - 10:04 AM

"the fda recently approved money to do research on wakefulness promoting meds. it should be done w/the amphetamines, little is known about them. once the patent righjts are gone, research no longer gets done on a med because there's no profit motive after that. i know i'm not the only one who can benefit from high dose stimulant therapy to treat eds/fatigue."

AMEN!

#13 doinmdirndest

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Posted 31 August 2013 - 10:44 AM

thought i'd top post this by replying to it.