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Finding A Partner And Dating For A Person With Narcolepsy? Do I Need To Go With Someone With The Disorder.


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#1 benji837

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Posted 26 May 2010 - 12:23 PM

I have trouble with dating and everything because people do not understand my condition. What have you guys found works for your successful relationships? How did you get through the tough social times? Where are good places for me to meet people and people who have 'N'? Any help would be greatly appreciated.



#2 firefey47

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Posted 27 May 2010 - 07:34 PM

I would think being with someone else who has narcolepsy would be difficult. Sure, they'd understand you well, but who would be the motivator of the two of you? My husband does not have narcolepsy and he is practically the ONLY reason I am able to get out of bed every morning. He helps me take my pills, brings me breakfast, makes my lunch, and literally puts me in the car until my meds kick in on the way to work. He drives, because I cannot. Now, there's a lot I do for him too. No one's perfect and relationships are all about give and take. But I can't imagine dating someone with narcolepsy in that I don't know who'd be there to help me get moving! I'd say go to a narcolepsy support group (or meet people online) to be friends with but continue to look for friends without narcolepsy as well too! AND a partner. I mean, ultimately, look for someone that makes you happy- because that's the most important thing. Dating will be tough, because it's hard for some people to understand. However, if you can get past that awkward dating phase, you'll have made a real powerful bond with someone that could ultimately be your biggest support system! :)

#3 SleepingPhoenix

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Posted 14 January 2011 - 01:00 PM

I would think being with someone else who has narcolepsy would be difficult. Sure, they'd understand you well, but who would be the motivator of the two of you? My husband does not have narcolepsy and he is practically the ONLY reason I am able to get out of bed every morning. He helps me take my pills, brings me breakfast, makes my lunch, and literally puts me in the car until my meds kick in on the way to work. He drives, because I cannot. Now, there's a lot I do for him too. No one's perfect and relationships are all about give and take. But I can't imagine dating someone with narcolepsy in that I don't know who'd be there to help me get moving! I'd say go to a narcolepsy support group (or meet people online) to be friends with but continue to look for friends without narcolepsy as well too! AND a partner. I mean, ultimately, look for someone that makes you happy- because that's the most important thing. Dating will be tough, because it's hard for some people to understand. However, if you can get past that awkward dating phase, you'll have made a real powerful bond with someone that could ultimately be your biggest support system! Posted Image



benji837:

I understand the concept of dating someone with N, since they will be more understanding regards the symptoms. I have had two divorces, previous being diagnosed and I thought I was not able to keep or even try again having a relationship again. Now that I've been diagnosed just a couple of months ago, I have my doubts about looking for someone who will have to deal with me and this health issue. I'm still thinking if there can be anyone that can understand and even dare to have a relationship where the word "normal" won't apply. I'm still giving thanks to God for the fact I have no children that would have to endure having a mother who would never be there, because she is too tire, or maybe forgot it, or misunderstood it. I have even left my former relationship after being diagnosed, cause I knew I could not offer what I thought I could and I just didn't wanna feel like a drag to anyone. Yet sometimes I still do.

I'd love to have someone in my life, because a relationship is something very precious to deny myself the chance of trying it again, but I'm sure I would not start it with a fellow N because I'd feel I'm gonna fail him everytime I have a bad day, and viceversa. I also know that love conquers it all and maybe it is not as bad as it seems. I'd look for fellows N for support and confessions and help, and advice. So far all have been helpful and have basically rescue me from the thought that I was not doing things right, that I was weak, lazy and crazy.

When I'm ready enough to try again for a relationship. I'll make sure I'll accept him just as he is,and make sure he'll accept me the same way. Do not enclose yourself in the concept that a person with N can be a better candidate for a relationship than anyone else. Look for someone who is willing to love you, above everything else. It may take time, but I still hope it can happen.