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Neighborly Nonsense For The Narcoleptic:


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#1 Saraiah

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Posted 07 October 2009 - 03:16 PM

This intrepid reporter observed the following episode right outside the front door of Saraiah Naps, person with narcolepsy, just before lunchtime today.

Saraiah approached her neighbor, "Amy," to discuss coordinating care for an elderly neighbor who had recently returned from the hospital. "Well!" said Amy,"You must have some project you want my help with, since otherwise you get out of your car and go straight inside. You NEVER want to talk to me!"

Saraiah, taken aback, replied, "Amy, I've been very ill for two years, and did not have energy to talk with anyone about anything. I just went to work and slept. But I did want to talk with you today about our neighbor..."

Amy agreed to lend a hand in caring for the neighbor, then arched her eyebrows as she tried to assess which illegal substance Saraiah was taking. She didn't seem to smell of alcohol... "You look to me like you are VERY dizzy. You ought to go right in and lay down now!"

Saraiah laughed and replied, "Amy, if I laid down every time I felt dizzy or unstable, I would never get out of bed. I have narcolepsy."

"Well!" said Amy, surveying Saraiah's generously rounded form, "I know SEVERAL people who used to have that disorder. And you know what causes it?" Saraiah could hardly wait for the coming cure. "Addiction to food! You need to go to Overeaters Anonymous! If you start eating healthy, and GO ON A DIET, you will overcome your narco-whatever it is and never feel tired again!"

After returning home, Saraiah mused to this reporter, "You know, my doctors tell me that in the history of medical science, no one has ever cured a true case of narcolepsy. But all I have to do to find a myriad of enthusiastically pronounced cures is to take a few steps out of my front door. The people I'm acquainted with may not know how to pronounce the word "narcolepsy," and they may not know the symptoms of the disease, but I'd say about half the people I meet instantly know how to cure it!"

Saraiah added, "And to the people with narcolepsy unlucky enough not to be 100 1bs. or so overweight, as I am: Sorry, I guess you all are out of luck in seeking a cure! Or should I say, out of luck until my next neighborly conversation. I'm sure the cure you can use will be headed your way some time soon! And I'll be sure to let you know as soon as I am lucky enough to be informed of what it is."

Till next time...

Your intrepid investigator,

Correspondent from the land of the Cretinous

#2 Rrrapture

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Posted 23 April 2011 - 02:57 AM

I had a good chuckle while reading this. Thanks!

This intrepid reporter observed the following episode right outside the front door of Saraiah Naps, person with narcolepsy, just before lunchtime today.

Saraiah approached her neighbor, "Amy," to discuss coordinating care for an elderly neighbor who had recently returned from the hospital. "Well!" said Amy,"You must have some project you want my help with, since otherwise you get out of your car and go straight inside. You NEVER want to talk to me!"

Saraiah, taken aback, replied, "Amy, I've been very ill for two years, and did not have energy to talk with anyone about anything. I just went to work and slept. But I did want to talk with you today about our neighbor..."

Amy agreed to lend a hand in caring for the neighbor, then arched her eyebrows as she tried to assess which illegal substance Saraiah was taking. She didn't seem to smell of alcohol... "You look to me like you are VERY dizzy. You ought to go right in and lay down now!"

Saraiah laughed and replied, "Amy, if I laid down every time I felt dizzy or unstable, I would never get out of bed. I have narcolepsy."
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