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Does This Offend You...


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#1 Lovemyhusband

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 12:09 PM

Andre calls me every night when he is on lunch or break at work (keeps him moving and not napping). If I am on NN site I tell him I am talking with my sleepy friends. He asked me last night what you all would think if you heard me say that. I didn't have a response.

So.......does it offend you that I call all of you my sleepy friends?

I never even thought about it since I say I am talking to my mommy friends when I am on a parents website. Just my luck to offend the people who give me the most support and information.

#2 Marcianna

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 12:41 PM

QUOTE (Lovemyhusband @ Aug 8 2008, 05:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Andre calls me every night when he is on lunch or break at work (keeps him moving and not napping). If I am on NN site I tell him I am talking with my sleepy friends. He asked me last night what you all would think if you heard me say that. I didn't have a response.

So.......does it offend you that I call all of you my sleepy friends?

I never even thought about it since I say I am talking to my mommy friends when I am on a parents website. Just my luck to offend the people who give me the most support and information.


I'm not offended at all! I think it's cute!
My BF used to call me his blanket flower (cuz I'm so pretty but I'm always in bed)
sad.gif I miss that. now he just calls me lazy.

The only thing that REALLY offends me is when people get Narcoleptic's and Necrophiliac's confused.
I have not once ever slept with a dead person.
You would be suprised how many people dont know the diffrence. It's disturbing.


#3 Lovemyhusband

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 12:52 PM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Aug 8 2008, 01:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>


The only thing that REALLY offends me is when people get Narcoleptic's and Necrophiliac's confused.
I have not once ever slept with a dead person.
You would be suprised how many people dont know the diffrence. It's disturbing.



Now that is disturbing. How can they get that mixed up. I am blonde and I got it straight.

#4 greatbig47

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 01:27 PM

No offense here...we are what we are.
Now if you said "LAZY" friends...
That would be different.

As long as it's not meant maliciously...I'm okay with it.

But again, we're in a forum where the "N" word has a COMPLETELY different meaning than it does in real life!
smile.gif

-Stu

#5 Marcianna

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 01:32 PM

QUOTE (greatbig47 @ Aug 8 2008, 06:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
No offense here...we are what we are.
Now if you said "LAZY" friends...
That would be different.

As long as it's not meant maliciously...I'm okay with it.

But again, we're in a forum where the "N" word has a COMPLETELY different meaning than it does in real life!
smile.gif

-Stu


NUDE?

Your right it is rather taboo.....

lol j/k

#6 Marcianna

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 01:34 PM

QUOTE (Lovemyhusband @ Aug 8 2008, 05:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Now that is disturbing. How can they get that mixed up. I am blonde and I got it straight.


I have no idea dry.gif it's messed up.

#7 greatbig47

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Posted 08 August 2008 - 01:43 PM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Aug 8 2008, 02:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I have no idea dry.gif it's messed up.


As much as I am opposed to calling "N" a disability, it is hard for some of us to admit it as a condition. I can understand it. ESPECIALLY as a man supporting a fam. If we're seen as "sleepy all the time", the regular social stigmas just hop on board.

I would say it doesn't offend me at all...but I know there are some who would be offended because it infers something that isn't totally correct. If I started getting the nickname of "Sleepy Stu", eventually I'd get pretty bothered by it.

I'd like to meet Andre, but chances are if he sees us as nothing more than a bunch of sleepy people, we might not ever get the chance. There's more to us than that, and for his involvment, he'd have to see that.

#8 sleepysarah

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Posted 09 August 2008 - 02:49 AM

obviously I don't mind the sleepy thing too much since I put it in my name...if that is only what you call us when you talk to Andre then it doesn't bother me at all. The only problem I have with the word sleepy is that it is a cutesy way of saying that you are tired in the "I didn't get enough sleep last night" sort of way. Nothing about the way I feel is cute and I feel more like I didn't get enough sleep over the last 26 years worth of nights. So sleepy doesn't quite cut it for me. That said, I agree with pp, at least you aren't calling us lazy (or crazy) smile.gif

#9 bagpuss

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Posted 09 August 2008 - 03:17 AM

THATS HOW I ALWAYS SIGN A LETTER TO MY CLOSE FRIEND "LOVE YOUR SLEEPY FREIND" SO ITS FINE WITH ME . smile.gif

#10 Lovemyhusband

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Posted 09 August 2008 - 08:45 AM

Thank you all for your honest answers. I see, now, how it could be OK in one aspect and disrespectful in another. I think I will just refer to you all by name instead of a group. Something I should have done since day one.

Thanks for setting me straight smile.gif

#11 Marcianna

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Posted 15 October 2008 - 10:49 PM

My friends son has taken to calling me Narcoleptian..... because clearly I have my own country or something.... It's disturbing.... I wonder if I should address this or not? he is 11.... but he is also a total smartass.... soooo????????

#12 Kimberly

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Posted 16 October 2008 - 08:30 AM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Oct 15 2008, 10:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My friends son has taken to calling me Narcoleptian..... because clearly I have my own country or something.... It's disturbing.... I wonder if I should address this or not? he is 11.... but he is also a total smartass.... soooo????????


I usually try to refrain from comments about kids, since I don't have any.

BUT -- 11 years old? He's in 5th grade, which is basically middle school, right? He's old enough to be told that it is inconsiderate and even hurtful to make fun of people because of a medical condition. If the person themself uses a particular term, it's probably OK to use or ask them if you can use it too, but not OK to make up a term on his own.

Just my opinion. As usual, I defer to the folks with kids who probably have better advice than me.

#13 Marcianna

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Posted 16 October 2008 - 02:39 PM

QUOTE (Kimberly @ Oct 16 2008, 01:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I usually try to refrain from comments about kids, since I don't have any.

BUT -- 11 years old? He's in 5th grade, which is basically middle school, right? He's old enough to be told that it is inconsiderate and even hurtful to make fun of people because of a medical condition. If the person themself uses a particular term, it's probably OK to use or ask them if you can use it too, but not OK to make up a term on his own.

Just my opinion. As usual, I defer to the folks with kids who probably have better advice than me.


!!!! Oh now there is so much more to that story!

But first I will say, I wasn't sure how to deal with it, because he might be trying to be clever... or maybe he is just trying to figure it out in his own head.... I wasn't sure....

But THEN.... yesterday they were over here for a minute dropping some stuff off to me....

He said the reason we don't have our own Narcolepsy country anymore is because nothing was ever getting done.

I totally turned around and smacked him for it.
(don't worry, his mom was there! She grounded him for a week too. And normally I dont run around hitting other people kids but she said he had that one coming.... so she wasn't mad. She actually thought it was funny. )


OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously. I was totally mad. I still am. Especially because I have actually sat him down in the past and explained it to him, like college level explanation because he is smart enough to understand it, and for him to say that was REALLY DEGRATING.

#14 Mike M

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Posted 17 October 2008 - 10:23 PM

While I am not one to advocate corporal punishment, I do agree that he had it coming. It is one thing to be "playing" with words. It is a whole new realm to be intentionally cruel. What I find most difficult to fathom is that you treated him as a peer when you you explained the condition to him. Teaching high school has made it painfully obvious how hurtful it is to my students when people treat them like children, rather than teens. I work hard with my own daughter to be a responsible parent, but also to respect her as a young woman. For this young man to say that to you is ridiculous. I do hope he learned a good lesson about how horrid it can be to hurt someone like he did.

By the way, I do not mind being referred to as a "sleepy friend" when it is a friend who is doing it.

#15 angellus

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Posted 18 October 2008 - 07:04 PM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Oct 15 2008, 11:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My friends son has taken to calling me Narcoleptian..... because clearly I have my own country or something.... It's disturbing.... I wonder if I should address this or not? he is 11.... but he is also a total smartass.... soooo????????


He's 11. Talk to his mom. or tell him at least your not as ugly as he is..hehe

#16 Marcianna

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Posted 18 October 2008 - 07:38 PM

QUOTE (Mike M @ Oct 18 2008, 03:23 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
While I am not one to advocate corporal punishment, I do agree that he had it coming. It is one thing to be "playing" with words. It is a whole new realm to be intentionally cruel. What I find most difficult to fathom is that you treated him as a peer when you you explained the condition to him. Teaching high school has made it painfully obvious how hurtful it is to my students when people treat them like children, rather than teens. I work hard with my own daughter to be a responsible parent, but also to respect her as a young woman. For this young man to say that to you is ridiculous. I do hope he learned a good lesson about how horrid it can be to hurt someone like he did.

By the way, I do not mind being referred to as a "sleepy friend" when it is a friend who is doing it.


I would not have explained it to him at a high level if I thought he would not understand,the kid is really brilliant. Like scary smart. Half the time he is explaining things to us... weird.

And most of the time I do treat him like a kid. I'm all about telling him to mind his own business when he tries to get involved with grown conversations.... I know what your saying here and I agree... Children should be traeted like children, but He is unique in being able to comprehend the concept of disorder an how the brain functions and such, If I had simply told him it just makes me sleepy alot he only would have asked me a million questions why.

His mom made him write a written letter of apology, she told me about it. She made him walk it to the post office and buy his own stamp and everything... so I doubt that he wont learn anything from all this. I haven't gotten it yet, but I should in a day or two...
I'm looking forward to it. It should be interesting.

#17 Kidlet

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Posted 18 October 2008 - 08:41 PM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Oct 15 2008, 11:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My friends son has taken to calling me Narcoleptian..... because clearly I have my own country or something.... It's disturbing.... I wonder if I should address this or not? he is 11.... but he is also a total smartass.... soooo????????



Hrm. Sounds more like another planet... maybe that's the key! We were all brought here from Narcoleptia and abandoned in this place where everything acts like Superman's kryptonite! Sleepy Narcoleptian...

I've been called FAR worse. biggrin.gif

#18 Mike M

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Posted 18 October 2008 - 09:09 PM

QUOTE (Marcianna @ Oct 18 2008, 07:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
His mom made him write a written letter of apology, she told me about it. I haven't gotten it yet, but I should in a day or two...
I'm looking forward to it. It should be interesting.


I do hope you will share it, at least the general idea of it. Also, I think it is great that you do talk to him in a more mature fashion. Children should be allowed to be children, but I also think that they appreciate being treated like people rather than kids. Still, his behavior was inappropriate. I hope you are doing okay with all of this.

#19 eldestpenguin

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Posted 18 October 2008 - 10:57 PM

I am not at all offended at being a sleepy friend, but I agree with Stu on the context. It is fine for YOU to call me a sleepy friend, as you understand that it is not a normal sleepy. I could be offended by someone that did not understand, and there are points where people are not being cute.

For the most part, I try to embrace this mess with humor or a light hearted attitude. When things feel really tough, I sing a song to the tune of the Red Hot Chili Peppers "Soul to Squeeze." I have rewritten the lyrics to suit my symptoms, but I just couldn't resist the first line of, "I've got a bad disease." My song is pretty safe, as I only sing it with people that I know are not offended.

I seriously want to print a t-shirt that just says in large bold letters, "I'M A NARC." I have also contemplated, "Weebles wobble, but I fall down." I find it to be wildly amusing. However, I can see where it might be offensive to others; perhaps even people that have other issues, conditions, or diseases. So, I refrain from the urge.



#20 dogdreams

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Posted 19 October 2008 - 12:21 AM

I'm totally your sleepy friend. How could that be offensive? I'm lots of peoples' sleep friend. I think somebody's a little sensitive! haha

You tell him I'm the one that came up with the bumper sticker "Cataplectics do it on the floor" and see what he says. N is nothing if I can't have a sense of humor about it. I dunno...would that make a better T-Shirt? smile.gif